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 Another D&D Crit Fail Story

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Chromatus Master
Star Seed


Star Seed

Title : Combo Maniac
Posts : 8
Join date : 2016-09-09
Age : 22

PostSubject: Another D&D Crit Fail Story   10th September 2016, 5:41 pm

Yikes...talking about D&D of all things. But I kinda wanted to tell this little story for a while now, and it technically can be in the Gamer's Lounge, since D&D IS a game. Granted it's a tabletop one but hey it works. Hopefully. 

So the story. This was my only real D&D campaign and I had rolled up an elven thief. I was stuck with....let's see....a Lawful Good healer, a Paladin, and a cleric in my party. Meanwhile I was True Neutral and rather flexible in my morality, to an obvious extend mind you, my character wouldn't leave friends behind nor would he just kill everyone in his path. 

But my thief was also one HELL of a kleptomaniac and he was just finding all the good loot throughout the game. And everyone was mighty ticked. It may not have helped that he was getting wasted at the tavern when he SHOULD'VE been asking for info and rumors. It all came to a head when we were going after a crime lord's mansion. You see we were at the top floor. And in a fight. I was busy weaving and dodging, trying to not get hit and doing a good job of it. Then came the Paladin's turn to roll.

She rolled a one.

That's when the DM went, "Suddenly Cassandra's shield slams into Stone the Thief, dealing five damage and sending him towards the window in a stumbling mess!" I had to roll a saving throw. Guess what I rolled?

A one. 

"Stone not only stumbles out of the window, the glass also pierces his eyes, blinding the poor man as he plummets to his doom!"

So yeah, my thief's career ended when our Paladin smacked me with a shield and sent my sorry ass out of a window. 

This is why I don't play D&D friends.
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